advice on how to systematically deal with people
starting a conversation
- relate
- but try not to get to repetitive
- while in conversation can probe for further talking points
- questions
- not too direct
- relaxed tone
- if responses ask follow up questions, less yes/no answers
- can share same info after a follow up question, making it easier for them to ask questions
- if quick short answers, person is likely doesnt want to talk
- body language
- become more approachable by smiling
- make eye contact
- if the person ignores eye contact, its likely they dont want to talk
- sit infront of the person you want to talk to
- other signs they dont want to talk
- feet facing away
dealing with anger
Its natural for people to get angry and most people will struggle to deal with their anger, espically if they are already having a bad day. And that anger can spread creating a depressing environment. Its important to be able to calm someone down, this will stop them losing their job.
- methods
- divert attention from problem
- calm solution to problem, if problem quickly solveable
- offer a break, convince person to take break early
- offer to talk if over
- reduce counter attacks that may raise anger
- find the source of anger
- if you are the source of anger and its a minor problem, be sorry but try to remind them that they could lose their job in future
- conflict between two people, try not to confront them both in public with a lack of info, suggest a possible solution to each person or remind them what really matters
- if you are angry dont lash out, being angry will reduce performance and make it more difficult to solve to situation without more unwanted trouble
taking ideas from workers
- if complaints try to clarify specifics
- if its personal or conflict with anouther specific person/group, ask for permission to ask others first
- dont pry to much, or may get exclued from the problem
- get opinions of the problem from other workers
- if small solve the problem yourself, otherwise take to management
persuading people to do something
It can be diffcult to convince someone to do a task, even if that task needs to be done for that individuals good.
-
persuade them over telling them
espically effective if you are younger or if you have the same/lower position, as people stick to their pride
- ask them to do it
- start the task yourself
- this way if the person is afraid to do the task they can follow your lead
- shows that you dont hold yourself high enougth to not do the task
-
change persons perception of the task
- give hints on how to complete the task easier
- avoid too much info, seem like a rude know it all or confuse them
- make the task seem easier
this is to avoid an overwhelming hill, giving someone a list of long/difficult problems is very likely to de-motivate
- break up the task into smaller manageable chunks
- progessively disclosure advanced parts of the task
- track progression
- share the tasks purpose
- rewards
- highlight the process over the reward
-
avoid rewards separate from the activity itself
this can reduce a persons desire to do something for the sake of of doing it, but can be effective if the activity is infrequent and boring
- give hints on how to complete the task easier
raise motivation
- avoid pessimisum
- encouraging statements on how things may get better
- try and instead get people to work together to come up with a solution
- own motivation
- motivating yourself, just getting a jolt of motivation is unlikely to work in the long term
- external motivation: add an external factor that makes it harder to not do what you need to do, EG commit with money or tell people
- discipline: strong mind and conviction, setting a minimum standard for what you have to do, EG always get up after alarm clock
this article is incomplete and still has improvements to be made